law of attraction

So…I’m back on the killer hill. Hiking. Or otherwise known as taking my life in my hands to walk on dirt, uphill, in black stretch pants at 8 am for no good reason.

I’m still fucking around with my little WiFi experiment, but interestingly enough, the signal has been uncooperative since those two miraculous days last week when all the stars aligned to give me my NPR.

But I’m still at it. My middle name is tenacious. Janet Tenacious Bertolus.

There may have been some begging even though I know that begging is the surest way to silence.

Through the years, I’ve been told by pretty reliable sources that The Universe doesn’t keep score, or prioritize, and I know for a fact that The Universe can’t be bothered with begging.

Asking? Sure. Prayers? Absolutely! Begging? Not so much.

Especially begging for something as ridiculous as WiFi to distract from the excruciating “discomfort” I put myself through trudging up that freakin’ hill every morning.
It sticks its fingers into its ears and LA, LA, La’s until I stop.

Anyway…no begging this morning, just resigned acceptance when the signal cuts out.
Shit.
Then I laughed because it’s getting funny.
Not.

Have I mentioned what an opportunist the Universe can be? Oh, yeah.
Just at the point where I am my most vulnerable; hands on my hips, bent into the hill, drenched in sweat and gasping for air like a sherpa about to summit Everest; the WiFi kicks in and Abraham on YouTube comes back on.

The Universe decides that this is the perfect time for a teaching moment.

I am elated.
This will help me summit my own humiliating, Studio City version of Everest. Except for one thing. I’ve already listened to this part. It didn’t pick up where it left off, it went all the way back to the beginning. Back to what I’ve already heard for the last forty minutes.
Shit.
A mild wave of disappointment washes over me as the smile leaves my face.

Immediately the signal cuts out. Silence returns.

Awwww come on! I actually shout out loud. What the hell?!

I stop and fiddle with my phone for a minute. Nope. Nothing. It’s no use. Resignation sets back in as I pull up my big girl stretch pants and soldier on.

It’s then that the Universe decides to give a lecture series entitled: Split Energy (Will Fuck You Every Time).

‘You split your energy. You do it all the time and you needed to see an example of how it can stop the momentum of a desire in it’s tracks.’

Clarify please, I barely have enough oxygen to keep me upright let alone understand what the hell you’re trying to tell me.

‘You desired WiFi. We gave you WiFi. And may we point out, in a place where WiFi doesn’t exist, so there’s that…’

I know! And I was so happy about that!

‘For a minute. Not even. Then you were disappointed by the specifics. That’s split energy and it will stall a desire faster than anything else.’

‘So what should I have done?’

‘You can’t stay grateful for a miracle for like five minutes?…What do we always say?’

‘I don’t know…be kind to others and don’t say fuck so much?’

‘Besides that. We remind you that disappointment is taking score too soon. When you ask for something and it arrives, don’t say, Oh, not THAT! it seems ungrateful and it hurts our feelings. Wait awhile before you take score.’

‘I suppose you’re right.’

‘Of course, we are! We’re the Universe! Whatever we deliver to you is ALWAYS perfect.’

Always?
Always.
What if…
Always.
What about that…
Always.
But…
What part of ALWAYS are you not understanding?

Point taken.

‘I’m at the parking lot and I have to pee so arrivederci and thanks for the chat.’

Listen you guys, who among us hasn’t questioned a wish fulfilled because it didn’t look exactly like we expected it to look?
We’ve gotta cut that out. Me included.

Carry on,
xox

*You could also add: We can make ourselves happy too. Same amount of work.
Here’s a short essay that states that in a different way – take a look.
xox

Why I’m rewriting Murphy’s Law
by psgrout

Pam Grout is the author of 17 books including E-Squared: 9 Do-it-Yourself Energy Experiments that Prove Your Thoughts Create Your Reality and the just-released sequel, E-Cubed, 9 More Experiments that Prove Mirth, Magic and Merriment is your Full-time Gig.

What do you think is the easiest ways to gather metal shavings?
Broom and dustpan? Windex and a paper towel? Magic wand?
How about a magnet?

Now apply that to gathering the right people for your new project.
Attracting the right partner.
Magnetizing money.

That’s right. Become the magnet.
Magnets have the ability to either attract or repel.
You know that guy at the office that you just can’t stand to be around? You are energetically repelled; so be prepared to say no when he asks you out…because he will.

Opposites may attract; but only for a short time, you just can’t override physics.

So, how do you become Magneto?

Here’s a trick I use.
I’ve done it since the 70’s, using it to help humanity by drawing in better fashion and hairstyles.

I imagine in my mind’s eye all the projects and people who I admire.
These days it would be:
Brene Brown, Liz Gilbert, Anne Lamott, Maire Forleo, Richard Branson, Daniele LaPorte.
The TedTalks, Hay House Conferences, OWN Network. Various Writing and Philanthropic groups.
All the big publishing houses, filled with their über creatives.
The smaller publishers hungrily looking for talent.

Then I bless them all. I send them love and light.
I imagine myself in their company. I belong there. I am their peer.

As I do that, I imagine the rearrangement of my molecules.
They become charged to the same frequency as the things I am imagining, and the metal shavings start their slow dance in my direction, so to speak.

Shipping containers, cars and refrigerators start flying my way…..Kidding.
(How cool would THAT be?)

But it’s fun to imagine being magnetized so that you can attract to you the people and circumstances you desire.

It’s my own personal super power.
I used it to attract my husband. Shhhhhhhh, he doesn’t know. Let’s just keep that between us.

I KNOW energy can do that.

It delivers control of the seemingly random aspects of life back to us.

You gotta love that.

I do this while I fall asleep, in the car, (no,no, not at the same time), walking the dogs and at the gym. Basically any time I don’t want my mind to wander into the minefield of my negative thoughts and doubts.

Give it a try for fifteen days.
Then report your results back to me.
Much love,
Xox