I look for any excuse to blame others for my wonky energy. You may have seen a few on this very blog.
Solar flares.
Too many bad hair days in a row.
Not enough sleep.
Constipation.
Trump.
So I will NOT let astrology off the hook.
Mercury retrograde we all understand. Right?
I mean, don’t sign any contracts, talk slowly and sweetly to all of your technology, don’t expect both your phone AND your TV to work simultaneously, and whatever you do, don’t marry Chad the Cad who just crawled back into your life.
Mercury doesn’t look in the rearview mirror as it speeds backwards through our lives. Nope. It’s a paper bag on wheels—filled with dog shit and everything we regret—and it’s on fire.
It emerges from retrograde on May 3rd. We can look forward to life after retrograde if North Korea hasn’t blown those of us on the west coast to Kingdom come before that. My guess is that Mercury retrograde would not facilitate a smooth missile launch so we can thank God (or astrology) for small favours.
Venus acting retrogradely is about re-visiting relationships. And not the good ones.
Saturn reminds us that old wounds sustained when we were most vulnerable can be the toughest to heal.
Uh, duh. Are you fucking kidding me? No one needs to be reminded of that!
Sheesh. I can’t even.
Anyhow, if it feels like cray-cray time out there right now—you are extremely perceptive—now go back under the bed until the middle of May.
Here is a site which can explain it all to you in a cohesive way and with an admirable lack of cursing.
I hear you. I care.
Carry on,
xox
