blessings

“It’s not happiness that brings us gratitude, it’s gratitude that brings us happiness.” 

As you all know by now, I’m currently in the midst of a gratitude storm because I truly believe in its mystical, darn right spooky, transformational power.

And I’ve gotta tell ya, this storm’s a real doozy. A virtual Thank You Tornado that feeds on itself.  My hubby and I got swept up and  are well on our way to filling our gratitude jar with slips of paper listing our blessings, big and small.

Besides the usual: family, friends, health, our dog, here are a few of mine—maybe (pretty please), you’ll share yours?

Thank you, chocolate chips. You make everything better. You jooj up cake batter, make banana bread exceptional, and I’m pretty sure no one would have ever heard of Toll House if it weren’t for you.

Thank you, sunrise. I know it’s cliche to be grateful for a sunrise or sunset, but this morning it was so spectacular with its periwinkle blue sky flecked with peach and rose-colored clouds I can’t help myself. Besides, when the Universe shows off in such a magnificent way—It feels rude to act indifferent.

Thank you, my body. Without you I’d be dead—so there’s that. You wake up every morning raring to go with a beating heart, eyes that see (albeit, with a lot of help from contacts), ears that hear, and feet that complain loudly with every step I take but still walk my three-mile morning hikes for me. Listen, besides taking a beating, you’re just a damn good sport.

Thank you, politics. I can’t even. Every day you make me happy I paid attention in Civics class, and you remind me of the glaringly obvious differences between RIGHT & WRONG.

Thank you, airline travel. Admittedly, you’re a pain in the ass, but the ability to have breakfast in LA and dinner in NY trumps all of that (pun intended).

Thank you, reservations and valets. You make dining out and going to the theater a pleasure. When I try to “wing it” with either of those, I always regret it.

Thank you, indoor plumbing. I have to admit, I take you SO for granted. I can’t imagine doing my business in a dark, cold, smelly outhouse, fighting off spiders and wiping myself with a leaf.

Thank you, metal drinking straws. You make the most ordinary glass of water seem civilized.

Thank you, pumpkin everything that starts showing up this time of year. Yep, I’m one of those people.

Thank you, kisses. Damn, I love ya. But I’m curious, how did you start? Who was the first person to pucker up and plant one? You’ve gotta admit, love and lips is a curious combination and I’ve always wondered.

Thank you, Instagram. I’m a voyeur at heart so getting a peek (although highly curated and orchestrated) into other people’s lives gives me a vicarious thrill.

Thank you, words. Because I get to choose just the right ones to express my never-ending gratitude to my readers all over the world who feel more like friends to me than anything.

Carry on,
xox

What in this moment is lacking?

You guys know how I love to collect quotes. I’m obsessed. Seriously. I’m a quote hoarder. Like I need to go to quote rehab. It’s all the stuff I wished I’d said. I guess it stems from quote envy…

Anyhow…Here are a few from that Rob Bell seminar last week that I thought could get you thinking.
They certainly did that for me. Some are so good you’re going to want to embroider them on a pillow or tattoo them on your face.

There are several from Rob, and the rest come from his invited speakers, who by the way were all brilliant.

So. “What in this moment is lacking?” Let’s start with that one by Rob Bell, shall we?

Nothing.
And that’s the problem. Our brains are constantly in search mode, looking, determined to find it. That thing that each moment lacks.
And you know what? Do that for long enough and you’ll have a list as long as your arm.

But in truth the answer is — nothing.
This moment lacks nothing.

It is the springboard, the jumping off place for the next and the next and the next. It is packed full of potential if you can change your perspective.
Try it.
You can always refer back to your long list.

Pete Rollins, I don’t know too much about him but he seemed like someone you’d want to share a pint or two with. Tons of hardscrabble wisdom in the body of a leather jacket wearing, truth talking Irishman.
Pete’s quotes have layers and layers of depth to them. Watch out!

“Fulfill your dreams so you can realize the abject horror of their impotence.” – Peter Rollins
(WTF?! This one could fuel the entire imaginary dinner table conversation that I have with world figures and people I admire.
What would Jon Stewart have to say about THAT?)

“Church should be like the Irish pub” – Rollins (No judgement, everyone’s welcome.)

“God is found in the midst of life, not the escape of it.” – Rollins (Talking about the argument that God can be found in hallucinatory drugs)

“We all have ghosts that become poltergeists. If you let them come out they become holy ghosts.” – Peter Rollins

If I could put my hand on your head and make you live forever but not experience the depth of life, I’m not a god. I’m a devil.  – Peter Rollins
(Here he was talking about the brevity of life and the role that the fear of death plays — See! I warned you. )

“Loneliness is the most lethal condition in existence.” – Rob Bell (talking about the lack of real connection even in this world of instant messaging, FaceTime, etc.)

“Before you can be free for life, you must be free from yourself.” – Rob Bell (you guessed it — free your demons)

“Ideas need flesh and blood.” – Bell (Regarding creativity and the reason our Muses choose us to execute their ideas.)

“Follow the joy” – Bell (the answer to someone’s question, “How do I find my path in life?”)

“It is such a letdown to rise from the dead and have your friends not recognize you.” – Rob Bell (Here he’s talking about when WE reinvent and rise from our own ashes and lose all our friends in the process because they just can’t relate to us anymore.)

“We turn graduations into divorces because we stayed too long.” – Rob Bell (Can’t we all just agree? Things just run their course?)

Speaking of creativity, this was from the Q & A with Carlton Cuse (the writer of LOST)

Q- “how much of the creative endeavor is luck and how much is hard work?”
Cuse – “almost none of it is luck.”
Ha! I love that! Almost none of it. I’m a firm believer in the saying “luck is when opportunity meets preparation.”
What about you?

These two are from Vicki Beeching who was enjoying her life as a devout Christian and writer and singer of inspirational music, but hiding a secret until it literally made her sick — the fact that she’s gay.

“When we worship certainty, we are attempting to tame the Lion.” – Vicki

“The only way to love and serve those around me is to be myself.” Vicki Beeching

I’ll leave you guys with these two to ponder, both by Rob Bell:

“Is this it?” is the existential thud of the American dream” – Bell (That thud was the sound we all heard as we grew into adulthood in the 20th century. I was wondering what that was.)

“A tribe to bless other tribes? That was a new idea. What does it look like for the U.S. to bless the world?” – paraphrased Rob Bell

What would that look like? I think it would look very much as it’s starting to look today.
One person at a time.
Being grateful.
Showering blessings.
Paying it forward.
Again and again and again.
Because this moment lacks NOTHING.

Carry on, I love you guys,
xox

GRACE
ɡrās/
noun

1. Simple elegance or refinement of movement.
“she moved through the water with effortless grace”
synonyms: elegance, poise, gracefulness, finesse

2. (In Christian belief) the free and unmerited favor of God, as manifested in the salvation of sinners and the bestowal of blessings.

verb
3. Do honor or credit to (someone or something) by one’s presence.
“she bowed out from the sport she has graced for two decades”
synonyms: dignify, distinguish, honor, favor

“Go out into the world and be a source of Grace for people.”
~ Caroline Myss

Shit. That’s a tall order, right? I can’t do that. Be a source of Grace? What does that even mean? I read the definition and I’m still not sure.

You guys, are we out in the world being a source of grace — or are we a part of the problem?

The first definition made me blanche. It does not apply to me AT ALL.
My movements are as far from refined as I can be without calling too much attention to myself. Remember how Elaine danced on Seinfeld? That’s how I move through the world. Every step is void of poise, there is not a drop of elegance to be found, and as far as finesse goes? — forgetaboutit.

So…Am I the source of grace in that respect? No, no I am not. I am definitely part of the problem.

As far as definition three goes, well, I feel like when we can, when the stars align and we have some free time — we show up for people. We do our best.
Actually some of us drop everything and Grace certain people or places with our presence TO OUR DETRIMENT, or at least I used to. Now a days I’m super picky about to whom and where my Grace gets distributed.

So again I suppose I’m part of the problem, except…Just like fucks given, Grace can be depleted (in my opinion, the studies are inconclusive) — you can over extend, you can run out, and you only get what you get.

But unlike fucks, Grace CAN be replenished by other people bestowing their Grace upon YOU.

So there you have it, there’s what I think Caroline Myss meant by being a source of Grace for people.

Sprinkle it around, like fairy dust, like a tall drink of water to the parched masses.

Replenish each other.

You know the people in your life that need a re-fill.

And you can recognize them on the street.

They look pale and hollow eyed, over tired, over wrought, over stressed and more than likely over weight. In other words they are just plain over it.

Wait. I’m so confused. Blah, blah, Grace. Blah, blah, replenish each other. So how do we do that?

And there’s where definition number two comes into play.
Bestow your blessings.
Being a source of Grace is about bestowing your blessings, and blessings, unlike fucks and Grace, come in an unlimited supply.

Blessings look like volunteering yourself for babysitting or dog walking.

Blessings look like filling the refrigerator of a workaholic.

Blessings are about picking up the check or leaving a thirty percent tip.

Blessings can hold open a door, clean up a mess, fold laundry, hold a hand, drive carpool, give a foot message and bring the wine (two bottles please).

Blessing are bountiful.
Blessings are bottomless, and in my humble opinion, blessings and the bestowal of them is what being a source of Grace is all about.

So easy peasy, right? Not such a tall order after all.
Whew! Sometimes this spiritual shit sounds SO undoable.

Whatcha think? Any more ideas for being source of Grace for people? I’d love to hear from you guys!

Carry on,
xox

Dog kisses,
Worn thin and soft t-shirts
Hot tea
Birthday cards
Foot massages

Xox

Two Saturday mornings ago at Yoga, Diana* kept repeating a phrase,
and as she did, it worked its way through my fuzzy, lazy, Saturday morning brain.
and it has continued to do so.

I receive ALL blessings.

Think about that one.

I receive…ALL blessings.

It started with my head, my brain, and I said “Oh Yeah, 
I do that”!
Then a few minutes went by as it percolated down to my true, true heart
and another “Ah ha”!
I absolutely DONT do that”!
And I know I’m not alone.

Why are we so stingy with the blessings we allow ourselves?

As I let it really sink in over several days and numerous meditations,
I realized that my blessing allowance was similar to my Christmas
shopping…only in reverse!

Instead of the “one for them, three for me”! that I was experiencing
and wrote about in “December Shopping Maniac”,
I could be a real Ebenezer Scrooge when reaching into
my bag of blessings.

I have MANY, MANY! Don’t get me wrong!
It’s not about counting the ones you have,
although that is a practice I HIGHLY recommend.
It’s about allowing yourself to continue to receive.
And therein lies the rub.

After careful consideration,
Here’s where it occurred to me I might be stingy with my blessings:

The blessing of patience,
I’ve been praying for that one since the 80’s!
Sometimes I’ve got it, I’m freakin Mother Teresa,
mostly I don’t, my hand are in tight fists, and I just won’t allow myself
to be blessed that way.

The blessing of financial abundance has alluded me for yet another year,
not that I don’t have enough to live, because I do.
But the blessing of a career that provides real relief from financial worries.

I receive ALL blessings.

The blessing of peace of mind.
A life without worry.
Why are we so damn stingy with THAT one?!
What is our/my attachment to that 3am appointment 
with dread and anxiety?

I receive ALL blessings

The blessing of time.
More time for sleep.
To take walks.
More time to laugh.

The blessing of letting other people do things for me.
Ohhhh that’s a hard one! 
Stingy,stingy,stingy!

I receive ALL blessings

I wrote it on the bathroom mirror to remind myself. I know I’ll see that at least twice a day!

Take a few minutes,
What blessings do you need to work on allowing?

XoxJanet

* DianaLang.com