What You Write In the Midst Of An FFT

Training starts this week, triggering epic levels of FFT, and I gotta tell ya, it has surprised me. 

I may be the queen of improvising, of high-wire walking, of seat-of-the-pants flight, but y’all—I don’t love being new at things. I don’t love being clunky and awkward and shitty at new skills. And don’t tell me to appreciate the vulnerability, because I don’t.

Case in point, the navigation video. Let’s just talk about the damn pre-training navigation video, shall we?  With all of its compass calculations and longitude and latituding. It was so mathy (my kryptonite) that I literally got nauseous—stopped it halfway through—and took a nap. 

4 times, people. I watched it (and walked out on it) FOUR incomprehensible, I just don’t get it and they will need a search party to find our sad, dead bodies, me, with my map in my cold, dead, hand because I may suck but I’m tenacious—times!

Fucking

First

Time

This training has me all effed up and I’ve ridden the world for weeks at a time on a motorcycle!

https://www.rebellerally.com

Like Brene says: Embrace the suck. And in case you’re wondering, here are her three tips for doing that:

Name it — The abject terror of sucking. Like becoming the face of gold-medal-level-suck. 

Normalize it — This is temporary, it’s how new feels and I don’t suck at everything, I make reservations really well.

Get Realistic Expectations — Lower the bar, it’s all new. All of it. The map navigation, racing a Jeep through the desert. Sleeping in a tent on top of our rig (gulp).

“Embracing our cringyness, is the secret sauce to leading a brave life.” — Also Brene and now I want to hurt her. So, here I go, into the abyss of suck. Wish me luck as I recite my new mantra.

I WILL suck. 

At ALL of it!

Until I don’t. 

Please pray for my partner.

Stay tuned. 

XOX Carry on, J

@rebellerally #wecandohardthings

The before picture — Lindsey, all smiles on top of our rig.