What The Fuck Are You Waiting For?

A written invitation?

“Yes. Yes, I am. That would be lovely. Except can you also make sure you send me an email reminder because—brain farts.”

I don’t think I’m any different from you guys. I see your Insta accounts!

I too have a virtual factory full of creative ideas inside my head that are clamoring to get out. A real David Copperfield meets Industrial Light and Magic warehouse of the mystical, odd and wonderful. The only trouble with my idea factory is that it really didn’t show up until I was close to fifty.

Hey, has yours shown up yet?

I have an excuse. In my early years, I was too busy to entertain a creative thought. 
I liked to eat, so I had a job. 
It was a real slog. 

I spent twenty years slaving like a diamond miner.  *sniff. Who am I kidding, I bought and sold gorgeous diamond jewelry in the land of swimming pools and movie stars. To be honest, my job was more like the life of a protected baby seal, basking on a warm rock while being fed tiny chocolate covered squid—by hand.      

Anyway… after I turned fifty the creative juices ratcheted up a notch (while all of my other juices took a hiatus—if you catch my drift) until now, at sixty, they’re in full, maximum, overdrive!

What the fuck? I have the best ideas of my life while I struggle to keep my tits from sliding over my knees?

How is that fair?
That seems like a huge mistake. 
A cruel joke. 
A cosmic fuck-up of epic proportions! 
Someone screwed up, right?

In the meantime, it appears that the Amy Pohlers, Amy Schumers, and Tina Feys of the world have figured this out.

God bless them.

Meanwhile, it took me FIVE years to collaborate on the first act of a musical and put it up on stage so I could listen to actors say our words and singers sing our songs (which, btw was sublime and surreal I’ve gotta tell ya). 

But all I kept thinking the entire time was: Why aren’t I thirty?  Why is this happening NOW? You don’t start stuff like this at my age, besides…
FIVE YEARS! 
A lot of things can go down before Act Two ever sees the light of day? 

It would be like me having a baby a sixty. How will my body ever recover, who will raise it AND will I be around to see it graduate?

Question: In this chapter of my life how many of these deep-divey projects should I take on?

Don’t answer that! It was rhetorical because the answer is: ALL of them! Seriously, what the fuck am I waiting for? 

Here’s what I’ve come to know for sure that the Amy’s and Tina already knew:

If you wait until your ready — forget it—You’ll never be ready!
If you wait until you’re good—forget it—you won’t get good until you try!
If you wait until you have the time or the money—forget that too—there will always be something that will gobble that shit up!

So this is my cautionary tale. A Special Public Service Announcement from me to you. 

If you’re filled with creativity, no matter what age you find yourself at, DO IT!  Don’t wait another minute!

Carry on,
xox