The Boomerang Theory

The Urban dictionary defines the Boomerang Theory as significant others finding each other again after a break up and still being attracted. Blah..blah..blah…

MY definition of the boomerang theory is a little less romantic—more like Karma but without the teeth.

Case in point.

The week before Christmas my husband and I spent most of our days running errands, finishing up shopping and trying to keep our heads from exploding and our hair from bursting into flames.

One such day I went on my hike, (a must for my maintaining my sanity) did a Trader Joes run, (it’s an addiction, what can I say?) did a dry cleaning drop off and pick-up, and had just enough time to wash the Jackson Pollack of birds latest work—in shit—off my car.

I don’t know about you, but the car wash is a “time suck” for me.

I try my best to utilize the time, to catch up on phone calls which is an asinine practice given the noise level or finish the fifteen podcasts I’m in the middle of. But more times than not I get stuck in Facebook or Instagram staring at pictures of people who are much better at life than I can ever hope to be.

Since my husband loves a clean car and literally cringes every time he sees mine covered in crap, he gifts me with a stack of free car wash coupons every chance he gets to make it that much easier for me to get my car back to the blue that the dealer intended.

So that means that I have on any given day about fifty of them in my purse.

And I’ve started giving them away.

When I pull in line to get my ticket I always give the lovely woman (who recognizes me because of the frequency of my visits) one of my coupons for a free wash and another one to anonymously gift to the next person who drives up. She gets giddy—I become invisible while I sit and troll all the overachievers on social media.

So, I’m sitting there that particular day, grumbling about some bitch named Barbara on Instagram who cans all of the fruit she grows and then makes gift baskets for the holidays when I see a man walking toward me with a grin from ear to ear.

He looks a lot like my husband but there’s no way…

“Hey, how about that!” he chirps gleefully as he bends down to give me a big smack on the cheek. “There really is a Santa Claus! I just got a free carwash!”

He plopped down on the chair next to me positively giddy with holiday glee.

That can’t be the ticket I gave the woman, I reasoned, that was close to fifteen minutes ago and there’s a line of cars who she could have gifted…

“Well, how did that happen?” I asked, dying to know.

He was distracted, busily digging through his cash for tip money, “She gave me a free wash coupon.” He nodded toward the woman in line.

I couldn’t keep from laughing. “I think she gave you MY ticket,” I said. “She knows we’re married, right?”

“Of course she does, I’m here all the time. I just gave her some cash for taking such good care of us all year.”

I shook my head laughing louder.

“What’s so funny?”

“Well, she gave YOU the free car wash I asked her to give away! So in essence You bought yourself a free car wash! Bahahahaha!”

Sure enough, he walked back to ask her and she admitted that the first person after me had a rain check and the next guy was an asshole, so…

Can I just tell you how much it tickles me that she is so careful about who she gifts the free wash coupon?

And in other breaking news: Just yesterday I won five dollars on a scratch-off lottery ticket I was given as a Thank You for some groceries I donated to a local soup kitchen.

The boomerang theory according to me. It appears that if you give what you can—just because it feels good—somehow, it finds its way back to you.

Tell me what you think.

Carry on,
xox